Scourge and Transparency

The Rise and Fall of Advanced Social Journalism during the Early Twenty-First Century

Archive for July 2009

In search of Canadianism

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What is your nationality? If you’re a Canadian citizen the answer is, obviously, Canadian. However, ironically, many of us Canucks would prefer attachment to our historical ethnicity rather than align ourselves with the nation we were born in. I have had countless futile conversations with my fellow Canadians on the topic of ethnicity and I find some of the opinions I receive annoying and bothersome. The subject often comes up when people ask me “Are you Italian?” I’m not one to split hairs but I find it difficult to answer that question. Nevertheless any Canadian with a last name ending in a vowel would claim to be an Italian in nationality and the same could be said that those with a “Mc” or “O’” surname would state that they are Irish.

One should appreciate one’s heritage, although there is a line in the sand where one’s connection to the mother land has long been forgotten and the culture that is current and prominent becomes one’s own.  If I claim to be an Italian (which in reality I am legally and technically not) than I must act in accordance with the expectations of those with whom I am speaking. It is not necessarily racially prejudice to assume that someone with a last name ending in ‘O’ or ‘I’ has a kitchen in their basement but it is at the very least annoying. I am not even a full-blooded Italian, I’m actually about half wop and I have to explain to people that I do not have lavish, huge, olive-oil soaked meals every night and that, on average, I usually eat as shittily as most non-Europeans. A lot of people are shocked and need to be reminded that Italians are actually having intercourse with non-Italians and breeding mutt children. I have gotten a multitude of bewildered reactions from people when I tell them that my mother in fact did not come here on a packed boat in the 1950s.

Ironically most of the racial stereotyping I have received in my lifetime has come from my so-called fellow Italians. These want-to-be guineas seem to think there is a strict regiment of Italianism that any descendent needs to adhere by. I have honestly been told to by some Mediterraneans that I should not own a pet because I’m Italian however I need to own a variety of suits and dress clothes. And of course I can’t eat Kraft Dinner and I have to watch soccer. What the fuck is that shit? Furthermore, on both of the aforementioned occasions I have asked these racial rivals if they had ever been to Italy and/or spoke the language to which both people answered “no” to each question. I assume to these racially-confused individuals it doesn’t matter if you’ve ever been to the country of your ancestors or understand the language, what is important is that you follow completely meaningless and ridiculous practices that for some reason they believe are stereotypical to their alleged culture. 

What I find incredibly vexing is where a lot of people draw the line when it comes to nationality. Many people with different types of ancestry seem to carry their ancestor’s ethnicity with them even though it was their great-great-great Grandparents that were the last in the family tree to be born outside of Canada. I think if anyone in your family beyond your biological Grandparents were from another nation you would have most likely lost any major cultural characteristics typical to the country of your long-dead relatives.  All in all, anyone whose parents were born in the same country as they were are more than likely absorbed in the culture and national attitude of their current citizenry. 

This feeling of misconceived nationality is a result of the cultural vacuum that exists in most of Canada. In much of Anglo-urban Canada there is very little to identify as completely separate from American in culture. Additionally, compared to other nations Canada’s cultural traits are minimal. Be this as it may, I don’t believe this is something to squawk about. Our lack of culture is actually what makes us unique and although there is very little to identity as purely Canadian in essence that which does exist is interesting, rare and distinct. This is the second largest country in landmass, there are two official languages, there are at least three founding nations and countless other intricacies and complications that Canada is characteristic of.

I am perplexed by the apathy that exists within much of Canada’s citizenry. We claim that we are not a “melting pot” like the US, but a “tossed salad.” However this is horseshit. The United States for centuries has been a melting pot of only white Christians and Canada is at best a tossed salad of the same. What I hope is that while many of us are proud of our background we still appreciate why our relatives (however distant) chose Canada to raise a family, find work and contribute to the economy and the culture.


Written by shanedantimo

July 19, 2009 at 8:26 pm

I’m not a bigot; but I’m about to say something ignorant, prejudice and otherwise discriminatory.

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It has come to my attention that many heterosexual men of all ages don’t actually hate gay people they just simply don’t want queers anywhere near them or their families and would prefer if homosexuals never expressed their views and personalities in anyway what so ever.  That, apparently, does not make them homophobes or zealots or any less ignorant than progressive thinking or honest human beings. This is because prior to expressing their ignorant and discriminatory stance these “non-homophobes” stated the indisputable and highly intellectual words “I have nothing against them.” Correct me if I am wrong, but this is literally urinating on a gay person and claiming that it is raining. Actually this is the equivalent to peeing on anyone, gay or not, that heard this fucking contradictory point of view.

very gay

The big gay-fest was up in Toronto recently (and I believe all over the world) and I don’t know how many small-town, blue-collar types were directly affected by the transvestites in downtown parades but is seems to have gotten under their skin. Maybe some pictures of vibrant, flamboyant effeminate gays were printed in that pinko, shitily-written, sports section-only, crap mag, rag The Toronto Sun and its’ kife sister papers.  Nevertheless, I have heard the aforementioned popular expression many times again recently. Why is that when people who obviously do not like gay people often express their annoyance towards homosexuals by firstly stating “I have nothing against gay people BUT….”?! And these types usually go on to say something along the lines of “BUT I don’t want them anywhere near me, and I hate the way they talk, I could never work with one, they shouldn’t have a parade, etc etc…”

If I may be so bold and pretentious to point out that it is, in fact, an “oxymoron,” or to the laymen a “stupid-fucking-thing-to-say,” when one states disapproval of something in conjunction with a contradictory expression.  Allow me to explain. If one in fact has “nothing against the gays” than that would mean they would be content with a gay parade existing and/or homosexuals behaving in a way that could be seen as effeminate or otherwise flamboyant and erotic.

In reality I am a realistic guy and I both understand the importance of a gay parade or pride week and could agree with some of the arguments made against it. I believe in progressive societies, like here in Canada, we need to see a horizon when the public at large no longer needs to make room for underprivileged groups; however, we have not reached that pinnacle yet.  And in the idealistic nation of the United States true civil and equal rights do not exist as of the summer of 2009 – gays cannot marry in every state and homosexuals are abundantly prejudiced against in both civil and public life.  Despite this it goes without saying that parades of any kind are an inconvenience to commuters; even so, I would say parades are on par with soccer fans blowing their car horns after they blow their load over a game that was won 1 to 0.

But I digress…what I cannot rap my mind around is what homophobes are so afraid of.  Many discriminatory white, male, bigots always want gay people to keep clear of their kin:

“I don’t care what they (homos) do in their own time but stay away from me and my family!”

What the fuck do they think gay people are going to do? Do these idiots think flamers just break into homes and rape the whole household into homosexuality and then redecorate the entire home into a fabulous gay pad before infecting the family dog with aids?! Just take it easy guys, believe it or not, gay men get laid the same way most hetero men do – they go to bars get someone drunk enough till they think you’re attractive then go back to their place and sneak away in the morning. Furthermore, as far as I know gayness, although tempting, is not contagious.

It goes without saying that we have reached the point in science and society where it is indisputable that people are born with their sexuality. I can honestly state I’ve never been in the mood or have been socially pressured into performing felicio.  I think gay people are aware of the risks of coming out of the closet and they certainty did forty years ago when they were thrown into jail for suspicion of homosexuality. Even still, in today’s world where gays are not “hated” but have specific ways in which homophobic bigots would like them to live their lives in accordance with white-male-hetero principles and keep clear of any straight families for fear of a gay outbreak in the suburbs.

This commentary is obviously addressing more of the gay and not necessarily lesbian prejudices. That is whole other kettle of fish and I know so little about the mystery of women that it wouldn’t be legitimate of me to write about the fairer sex in that way. Nevertheless many of the homophobic zealots I am criticizing probably masturbate to lesbian porno on a nightly basis (along with most other hetero males with access to a computer) so that just throws a whole other vagina/gay wrench into the mix.

In addition, I have previously written some on the use of the word “gay” being used to describe something other than homosexuality. The main point here is that it is not just derogatory and offensive to use gay as a synonym for both a sexual preference and for people you don’t respond to your text message.  Also, using the word gay to dub anything negative is simply not using proper English and I would even argue it is bad slang. Something like homosexuality that is incredibly specific and explicit shouldn’t be thrown about when labeling something other than a man sucking a penis or a woman eating a muff.

Unfortunately, homophobia is a deep and complex part of our society and while we’ve made headway there is a great distance to go. Even younger generations are still paradoxically prejudice and dogmatic. Many of the homophobes that I am railing against are young males who dislike homos even though they slap asses after the game and see more dicks in the change room than a young gay man could ever dream of. 

As the old saying goes, as long as I don’t have a penis in any of my orifices or within my eyesight for an awkwardly long period of time I will still be in the lonely, restricted, bias and desperate straight camp.

Written by shanedantimo

July 13, 2009 at 7:48 pm